View From The Bleachers

July 24, 2014

GirlieView (07/24/2014)

Filed under: Featured,General — Lizzie @ 4:00 am

GirlieView Definitions

  • Lizzie = A funny, timely quote made on the VFTB site by our writers or commenters.
  • Lizard = The best Lizzie.
  • MVL = Most Valuable Lizzie’er: The person with the most Lizzies in the period under review (usually the past two weeks.)
  • Top 10 of the 2014 Season = The folks with the most aggregate Lizzie points YTD (1 point for every Lizzie, 3 points for every Lizard.)

As you already know, this is all completely subjective and according to my whims.


  • Homer Simpson is a fictitious character
  • I listened to the Iowa game last night after the cubs blew up. More interesting at this point.
  • the odds of someone like Sale becoming available anytime soon are somewhere between the odds of me winning the lottery and my son becoming the King of England.
  • Well written and very well thought out, Noah. I think the long play is going to work out regardless of the bits.
  • I have done a complete 180 on Valbuena.
  • Great to be in Chicago and walk into a bar with the Cubs game on by default.
  • I really lost interest in the won and loss record and I am focusing on all these fine young prospects for the future.
  • if you are 26 and still in AAA, you are “ready” regardless if you really are ready. It is s**t-or-get-off-the-pot time for you.
  • They asked the same question at the Miss America Pageant this past year. You stole Miss Montana’s answer
  • I want players who are driven to succeed and don’t need me as the manager to act a fool to get them to produce.
  • At this point, the team doesn’t have much to lose, so why not take more chances in an attempt to score.
  • the Cubs winning or losing this season actually has very little bearing on how close they are to being competitive.
  • Marla Collins.
  • Lizzie said busts, plural. I’d go with Marla and Don Zimmer.
  • Going to miss my bestest baseball buddy and most loyal Cubs fan
  • My cousin Don Hausser Jr will be throwing out the first pitch at the Cubs game today, Sunday July 13. He will be in his formal service dress, this is part of the Cubs honoring our military. I was hoping cousin Don would be allowed to pitch instead of Edwin Jackson yesterday but unfortunately Jackson was allowed to pitched and gave up an era busting 9 earned runs in 3 2/3 innings. Cousin Don could have done better.
  • See a win today and my glass is half full again.
  • Unless you have a cup column going, now would be the time to add a folder of that name to your desktop.
  • If you look at the totality of the pitching acquisitions (and what they were turned into) the Cubs have made in the Jeo era, we are ecstatic.
  • I don’t know about you, but the next 2 days are pretty lean for me as far as sports go. There’s CFL football and British Open golf. As I said, lean.
  • I think Darwin Barney’s baby cost him his job.
  • It wouldn’t be the first time some guys little head cost him a bunch of cash.
  • I can see the Jesus resemblance for Schlitter, although to me he looks more like someone that was cast off the duck dynasty show on A&E and took up baseball instead. Honorable mention goes to James Russell for sporting the same backwoods look. Hopefully one of them gets traded as I’m never quite sure which one is on the mound until the tv announcer mentions it.
  • A couple weeks ago JD mentioned the herd mentality of major league players in the context of beards and facial hair. They all want to be individuals, he said, but they all want to look alike at the same time. Seemed a bit insightful.
  • I’m still rocking the Mitch Williams
  • As well you should be. Never a finer mullet have I seen.
  • Good news! Ian Stewart is available again!
  • I still think people overrate what Dunn would have done for the 2009 Cubs because he would have had to play RF and his defense would have been historically terrible.
  • Joe saw Murton naked, and we don’t talk about that nearly enough.
  • I simply walked up to him and asked him to remove his clothes. Isn’t that how you guys do it?
  • Very professional. Most of us would have gone with the curtains/drapes bit, I’d expect.
  • A tenth of a percent chances to win it all and cheap prom dresses. You win some, you lose some.
  • Nate “I knew it was going to come around” Scheirholtz was a study in despair yesterday
  • Wood still pitches hard.
  • Good Wood is hard…I believe the old saying goes.
  • Looks like the Darwin Barney era has ended.


  • Statistics, in and of themselves, don’t always provide answers. Rather, the statistics tell you where to go start looking for possible solutions and/or useful inferences. The article (and comments by all!) have illustrated this extremely well.

Shout Outs

  • A hearty 2014-Season welcome to Kac, who made his first in-season appearance in the GirlieView this time around. With the Lizard no less! Thanks for being here!


  • Congratulations to jswanson, our Most Valuable Lizzie-er this time! Way to go jswan!

Top 10 of the 2014 Season (one point for each Lizzie, three points for the Lizard)

1. jswanson
2. Doc Raker
3. Eddie Von White
4. Seymour Butts
5. Joe Aiello
6. Chuck
6. Dork
6. Doug S.
9. Mark From Toronto
10. Jerry in Wisconsin
10. Noah Eisner

Chit Chat

Right now on the 25-man roster, who are your three favorite Cubs? And who are your three least-favorite? We’ll see who among them remain on the team as the weeks march on!

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Elizabeth Pearson stumbled upon VFTB around 2006, and enjoys encouraging conversation among the wide variety of readers brought together by their love of the Cubs. She’s married, has a Cub-loving pug named Phinneaus, and enjoys biking, hiking, cooking and gardening. She calls Chesterton, Indiana home and hopes to one day retire on Mackinac Island. Connect with Lizzie via email or Instagram.

  • Doug S.

    + Rizzo, Castro, Alcantara
    – Villanueva, Sweeney, Schierholtz

  • Dork

    I’d prefer to go to the 40 man – Rizzo – Bryant – Soler Oops Bryant is on the 40 man. Balls are going to fly out of Wrigley when thos are your 3-4-5.

  • Dork

    I have not figured out why the cubs pitching has fallen apart so bad since the trade. It is not just the replacement starters. Were Jeff and Jason doing everyones homework?

  • Dork

    In July the cubs relievers have an era just under 6. FIP on the other hand is 3.21.

  • Noah_I

    I think a part of it is that Wood and Jackson have been pretty bad this season as well. So instead of having 3 pitchers throwing really well and 2 pitchers not throwing well, the Cubs now have one pitcher throwing well, two throwing not well, and unknown quantities behind them. I’d be curious to see if Wood continues his home/road dichotomy over the next home stand. His ERA/FIP/xFIP is 3.88/3.72/3.96 at home and 6.27/4.81/5.35 on the road.

    Also, as you noted in your next comment, they appear to be due for some positive regression.

  • Lizzie

    Dork, everyone would rather go to the 40-man, that’s too easy!

  • Dork

    On the 25 the only one you might argue about is #3 – Rizzo – Castro and #3?

  • Lizzie

    There’s no arguing going on. Just pointing out that the question referred to the 25-man for a reason: because it’s more difficult than picking from the 40. That’s the whole point.

  • Seymour Butts

    Should Rizzo even be in consideration at all? I mean with his well documented anti-social behavior in Iowa and all.

  • Mark_from_Toronto

    Fav’s: Rizzo, Alcantara, Arrieta
    Least fav’s: Jacskon, Baker, Lake – unfortunately doesn’t look any of these guys are going anywhere though.

  • jswanson

    Moot. He hit two homers for a sick kid, so we’re good to go.

  • jswanson

    +Rizzie, Cassie, Arrietie
    – Baker, Jackson, Villamustache

  • jswanson

    Drinks on me! Pa pow!

  • Dork

    funny how Ricky does that

  • Jerry in Wisconsin

    I believe that in all of the commotion of Jeff and Jason leaving someone forgot to close the door and the Bupkiss’ dogs came in and ate all of the homework

  • Eddie Von White

    Instead of following the unsolicited advice of Mark from Toronto and making sure I get enough sleep every night, I stayed up to watch the Cubs. For some reason, I could not tear myself away from the 6th inning slaughter. Today I feel like trash. God help me.

  • Doug S.

    I’m on the west coast. The time zone means I’m awake for Cubs games, good and train wrecks like last night. The 6th was brutal.

  • Dork

    I couldn’t take it I flipped over to the Iowa cubs at the same time as the debacle Brett Jackson walked to load the bases in front of Baez Bryant Soler – I felt sorry for the pitcher

  • Buddy

    Thad Bosley, Richie Hebner, Larry Biittner

  • Doc Raker

    Congrats Jswan. Let’s meet at the Vegan Eaterie for a granola bar and some soymilk to celebrate your commentary brilliance. How about around 4PM, Seymours Chevy Volt starts running out of battery power around 5PM so we need to do a blue hair special.

  • jswanson

    I could use some flax.

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