GirlieView Definitions

  • Lizzie = A funny, timely quote made on the VFTB site by our writers or commenters.
  • Lizard = The best Lizzie.
  • MVL = Most Valuable Lizzie’er: The person with the most Lizzies in the period under review (usually the past two weeks.)
  • Top 10 of the 2014 Season = The folks with the most aggregate Lizzie points YTD (1 point for every Lizzie, 3 points for every Lizard.)

As you already know, this is all completely subjective and according to my whims.

Lizzies

  • If you call a baseball trip to Minneapolis, Milwaukee and Chicago, 7 games in 10 days exciting, I’m doing it.
  • My vacation this summer will be my two whole weeks without youth baseball. During that span I plan on building a bridge for the backyard and organize the garage including finding a happy home for all my tools.
  • Has anyone else noticed that West Toronto in Wisconsin is tied for 9th?
  • I get Raker’s Lizzie strategy: flood the blog with Lizzie prospects and by sheer volume of prospects you’re guaranteed some of them will succeed in MLL (Major League Lizzie). It’s just like Theo and Jed’s game.
  • That’s been Jswan’s M O for about……ever……..like………..for sure.
  • I have renewed optimism for the Cubs – it appears the system works. Forget about Theo and Jed – you and Jswan should be in the front office.
  • I just got back from a camping trip with my son and have to add honey to my condiment list. For those keeping track at home.
  • We’re already over a third of the way into the season (shocking, I know)
  • I was watching that game where Machado intentionally threw his bat. I thought he deserved more than 5 games, more like 10+. I mean what if that would have hit a player or worse yet, in his attempt to hit a player, he hit a fan?
  • It took 2.5 months but we got our first road series win of the year!
  • I am a small-Hall guy.
  • I’ll buy the sandwiches if you can convince Schwarber to dine with you.
  • Rookie ball diners is right up Seymour’s ally. Seymour can upgrade Schwarber to double meat at the Stop Light Sub Stop.
  • Chips and a drink, too…I’m good for it.
  • Combo is what they call it.
  • Wood got wood. Cubs win.
  • Seems the bullpen usage tracker fell apart while I was gone.
  • and Joe added a link to cheap prom dresses in the Resources area on the right.
  • I didn’t realize June was prom season.
  • Part of me wants to believe [Samardzija] is the real thing, but part of me feels a foreboding of an imminent breakdown that will leave us with inconsolable forlornness.
  • “Do fish trot?” After Jim DeSahaie’s introduced the Marlin’s starting pitcher, Nathan Eovaldi, “The Marlins trot out hard throwing Nathan Eovaldi today. The Marlins have the hardest throwing pitching staff we have seen with Eovaldi throwing in the mid 90′s.” Kaspers response is “Do fish trot?” No scouting report on Eovaldi, no comments on how he has been throwing of late, no comment on his arsenal of pitches, just “Do fish trot?”
  • Jeff of Indiana is of non-virgin birth.
  • I would call that el Diablo hair. I think we could look at Jesus and not get that icky feeling and want to go wash our eyes out with soap.
  • “How about a Freaky Friday where we change places with another commenter.
  • I will start by becoming Raker:
  • The reason the Cubs have not won in a century is Obama. He forced the northsider’s into accepting food stamps and government cheese. Started when he was a young Kenyan in 1909.”
  • I am flatter you want to be like me. I hope one day you can evolve into a fun loving well rounded bloke but judging from your post you misunderstand the true essence of being a Raker.
  • You forgot to name drop a wine of which we’ve never heard.
  • I also neglected global warming or the threat of sailing off the edge of the earth. There is only so much room and way too much material.
  • I’d appreciate a youth baseball stat update and some stuff about hockey.
  • Now I think you are mocking me. Seymours ‘be like Raker’ post was the highest form of flattery but now I sense some mocking going on here.
  • I don’t get it, it is all fake so why is it interesting? Do you pretend to be married to Angelina Jolie and recount fake romantic dinners? What is the sense? Am I missing something?
  • I don’t find Angelina Jolie all that attractive. Something about kissing your brother is a turn off for me.
  • If your brother is built like her, I would not rule it out.
  • Dreamer
  • I’ll have you know Samardzija played football in college.
  • Well, you’ve got me there for sure!
  • The cubs have a way of making the pirates look good.
  • I would think Len Kasper’s call of Rizzo’s home run went something like this, “John Legend Bobble Head night is tomorrow so come on out and get your bobble head. I love Legend’s silky smooth voice. Hey Rizzo just hit one into the bleachers, tie game 1-1.” DeShaies, “He took a high outside hanging curve and just crushed it the other way, I don’t even know how his bat reached that ball.” Len, “Do you think Rizzo is a John Legend fan? I met Legend backstage at a percussions conference. We almost went to Subway together but he said he regrettably had to get going.” DeShaie’s, “Your not going to see many guys hit that pitch out of the ballpark.” Len, “I should of stalked Legend when he left the conference, he is so cool.”
  • Wood is my anchor. It’s been said he pitches hard.
  • Has anybody here seen my old friends Johnson? Can you tell me where they’ve gone?
  • I don’t know, but it wasn’t that long ago when a guy couldn’t turn around here without bumping into a Johnson or two.

Lizard

  • He might be the Cubs “Ace,” but he is not an Ace.

Shout Outs

  • We’ve got no new commenters getting Lizzie’s for the first time this week so let’s have a big round of applause for all of our loyal friends who keep us laughing every day at VFTB! Thank you all for being here!

MVL

  • Congratulations to jswanson our Most Valuable Lizzie-er this time! Way to go jswan!

Top 10 of the 2014 Season (one point for each Lizzie, three points for the Lizard)

1. jswanson
2. Doc Raker
3. Seymour Butts
4. Eddie Von White
5. Joe Aiello
6. Chuck
6. Dork
6. Doug S.
9. Jerry in Wisconsin
10. Chet West
10. Mark From Toronto

Chit Chat

How are you following the Cubs this year?

a. I watch or listen whenever I can
b. I watch or listen when I’ve got nothing better to do
c. I rarely catch a game but follow the progress in other ways
d. Has the season started?

Feel free to improvise if you don’t care for my options!

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Elizabeth Pearson stumbled upon VFTB around 2006, and enjoys encouraging conversation among the wide variety of readers brought together by their love of the Cubs. She’s married, has a Cub-loving pug named Phinneaus, and enjoys biking, hiking, cooking and gardening. She calls Chesterton, Indiana home and hopes to one day retire on Mackinac Island. Connect with Lizzie via email or Instagram.