GirlieView Definitions

  • Lizzie = A funny, timely quote made on the VFTB site by our writers or commenters.
  • Lizard = The best Lizzie.
  • MVL = Most Valuable Lizzie’er: The person with the most Lizzies in the period under review (usually the past two weeks.)
  • Top 10 of 2013 = The folks with the most aggregate Lizzie points YTD (1 point for every Lizzie, 3 points for every Lizard.)

As you already know, this is all completely subjective and according to my whims.

Lizzies

  • Ervin Santana, of the Royals, is now following me on Twitter. I’m not sure why, but I’m not gonna complain.
  • On an unrelated note, KC Royal Ervin Santana tweeted that he had no idea how to work this damn new phone thing.
  • Watching the Dodgers/Jays while waiting for the Cubs game. Marmol came in. 4 hits, 3 runs (1 HR), a walk and a wild pitch. It was beautiful.
  • And yet somehow the Jays still managed to blow that game and get Marmol off the hook. If only the Cubs were as fortunate when Marmol was crapping the bed for us.
  • if you didn’t say anything to your kids and just stood there blankly staring at them with an unshaven face spitting tobacco juice every now and then, I’d say you need to get riled up a bit.
  • That or grow a better beard.
  • she cries every night that she did not throw you in the quarry in a pillowcase as an infant.
  • I’m against giving Jeff Samardzija # 1 or even # 2 starter money when it comes to contract time.
  • If we use just this season as our sample, [we have what] I’d equate to a footlong with ranch dressing amount of position player injuries, but only a few bites from a 6″ with no ranch worth of pitcher injuries.
  • And where do the white chocolate raspberry cookies come in?
  • On the bench, next to the Gatorade.
  • We should name it the Slammed Door Law, if you fail to walk through an obviously wide open opportunity that door will slam shut on you quickly with disastrous results. The Cubs have walked into the Slammed Door too many times to list.
  • Apparently Shark used to play college football at Notre Dame.
  • You have caused me to do some internal soul searching as to why I am skeptical of Smardjgdrwtc. Is it his pitching that upsets me or his ugliness?
  • I don’t like my pitchers pretty. I like them frightening small children during charity visits and having butch girlfriends. But to each his own.
  • Oops. My bad. I forgot you don’t get sarcasm.
  • It’s not that he doesn’t get sarcasm, he just has no use for it.
  • He is just a few Bazinggas short of being Sheldon
  • Read the post again. She did it again the next day. It was the only way she would learn.
  • You are missing the point…the neighbors…it was about the neighbors.
  • Dick move. Being nice to your mom is grown man 101.
  • There will come a time when you are your parents. What goes around will come around.
  • When the wife’s back is turned, I am watching the wife’s backside.
  • A Scuba trip to the Caribbean in late October. I figured I would not miss any important games then.
  • You won’t.
  • No important games until 2014 at the earliest.
  • You may want to steer clear of the mayo at the Cozumel Subway.
  • As long as it is not moving, it’s ok.
  • On a prior trip to Cozumel Big Z threw his no-no whilst I was gone. I’m hoping the internet access improved in the interim.
  • Well, we know Big Z hasn’t.
  • It’s nice to have Sherm back.
  • The only thing relevant about the Cubs at this time of year is which of their players can help a contender.
  • I’m kind of sad to see him go, but it’s for the best. I was just yelling at my mom about not understanding that last night. I fear I may have to do so again tonight.
  • We’ve tried to keep our relationship on the down low so as to not upset my unhealthy obsession with Carlos Villanueva’s facial hair.
  • I decided to pull a Mark_from_Toronto and go to bed at the end of the 8th inning full of optimism. I slept well and my day wasn’t ruined until I got up.
  • Unfortunately I wasn’t able to to do the same for the afternoon game as it’s not really appropriate to go to sleep while driving home from work.
  • It is similar to how we say nice things about somebody after they pass on
  • I was following the trade rumors today, hoping to see Ronnie Woo-Woo shipped for a pitching prospect. Maybe Ronnie and the visor gal for Stanton…
  • it’s too bad we couldn’t unload him at the deadline, even a sack of used baseballs might have been worth it.
  • Can Olt really be recalled to the Cubs from Iowa if he’s never been there before? Wouldn’t it just be called?
  • Google
  • Bruce is Hector’s aunt.
  • Anyone else notice our Johnsons have gone missing?
  • I’m sure you’ve read about this from the 349382749837 sources covering the story today.
  • these players knowingly did something they knew was wrong and hoped to get away with it.
  • I see this as a failure of baseball: the sport turned a blind eye to the issue for years, and now this “harsh justice” seems disingenuous.
  • I’m looking forward to the day when the most reported baseball stories are positive – it seems like we’re a long way from that point, though.

Lizard

  • I’m honored that so many of you have adopted my game watching strategy.

Shout Outs

Many thanks to Chris and Sean_in_Blue who logged their first Lizzies of 2013. We’re happy to have you here!

MVL

Congratulations to Seymour Butts, the Most Valuable Lizzie’er this time around! Imagine that!

Top Ten of 2013 (one point for each Lizzie, three points for the Lizard)

1. jswanson
2. Seymour Butts
3. Eddie von White
4. Doc Raker
5. Jedi Johnson
6. Joe Aiello
7. Chuck
8. Doug S.
8. Jeremiah Johnson
8. Jerry in Wisconsin
9. Buddy
10. cap’n obvious
10. Noah Eisner

Chit Chat

If you could play professional baseball (and play it well!) what position would you like to play?

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Elizabeth Pearson stumbled upon VFTB around 2006, and enjoys encouraging conversation among the wide variety of readers brought together by their love of the Cubs. She’s married, has a Cub-loving pug named Phinneaus, and enjoys biking, hiking, cooking and gardening. She calls Chesterton, Indiana home and hopes to one day retire on Mackinac Island. Connect with Lizzie via email or Instagram.