I had to wrap up the wrap up a few days early this time around but rest assured I’ll pick up next time right where I left off so none of your gems will be missed even if you just posted them within the last day or two.

GirlieView Definitions

  • Lizzie = A funny, timely quote made on the VFTB site by our writers or commenters.
  • Lizard = The best Lizzie.
  • MVL = Most Valuable Lizzie’er: The person with the most Lizzies in the period under review (usually the past two weeks.)
  • Top 10 of 2013 = The folks with the most aggregate Lizzie points YTD (1 point for every Lizzie, 3 points for every Lizard.)

As you already know, this is all completely subjective and according to my whims.

Lizzies

  • Long live the trough.
  • Jeff Baker helped hang the L flag again at Wrigley on Tuesday night
  • This Kevin Gregg talk wasn’t just a cruel joke?
  • Does nobody remember why we say “that Gregging MotherGregger sure Gregged things up last night” around here?
  • They aren’t REALLY going to college Rav.
  • In all fairness, those girls make their livings by schmoozing rubes from landlocked rural states. Seymour doesn’t stand a chance.
  • My sub will be roast beef today.
  • She then asked if I would like my meat warm.
  • A girlie view and a victory. What a Thursday.
  • This is making me hungry for trail mix.
  • It’s not just a baseball problem, it’s a societal problem.
  • His parents named him “Thom” for starters.
  • I tend to believe Lizzie since she is in the media room everyday.
  • Now scat.
  • Not everyone can be Adrian Peterson
  • Or Scott Peterson
  • Also, I’d like to note that the Cubs are 2-0 in games that I have recapped and 4-13 in games that anyone else has. And, no, I refuse to believe this is coincidence. This is clearly the one situation where 2 games is a significant sample size.
  • poor Carlos Villanueva
  • my thinking was that Svuem might have been trying to blow Marmol’s arm out
  • He was a decent running back, and had an unfortunate Flock of Seagulls Hairdo.
  • Villanueva may have figured out how to get a win, Go all nine innings so the bullpen does not blow the game for you.
  • It’s the stache. The hitter gets up there and he thinks Villanueva is smugly smiling at him and it messes with his brain and he can’t hit.
  • Garza completes successful Towel Drill session, appears ready by August.
  • A friend of mine likened the current iteration of the Cubs to a person going through a cleanse.
  • If anybody told me I would be watching Kevin Gregg piggyback a Carlos Marmol effort again in my lifetime, I would have told them to keep smoking what they are smoking and eventually they will pass out.
  • Nothing like a mid-April Blizzard to warm the cockles.
  • I understand that Marmol is the toxic that we are trying to get rid of, but we picked up Gregg, does that make him the enima?
  • Pretty sure we could just start re-using the same post for game reviews. Solid pitching performance by starter, no clutch hitting, etc. Maybe add a second one for extra innings games.
  • Don’t forget, “Barney did something gritty.”
  • We’ll need a Feldman-specific recap because even if he pitches well, he manages to boot a ball like a 3rd grader once a start.
  • He’s a comebacking line drive to the torso away from being adopted by Mark Prior.
  • Ian Stewart: “Has anybody here in Des Moines seen my swing? It was right here in my locker.” Nervous smile. “Seriously guys. Who took my swing? I am going to go take a shower and it had better be back in my locker when I get back.” Ian leaves the locker area and heads to the showers. As soon as Ian is in the showers Brett Jackson takes Ian’s swing out of his duffel bag and put it in Ian’s locker. Brett Jackson muttering to himself: “#$@& thing never worked anyway.” Fade to black.
  • Rock Shoulders has to make it to the Bigs so I can buy that jersey. Best name in the minors.
  • Any time that Len says, “Gregg is up in the bullpen,” I die a little on the inside.

Lizard

  • The Cubs have had major struggles with games on the road, games where the bullpen needs to be involved, games that involve runners in scoring position, and games where they are required to field the baseball.

Shout Outs

A big shout out to the following reader who submitted his first 2013 Lizzie. ;-)

  • Drew Peterson

MVL

Congratulations to Chuck and Jedi Johnson the co-Most Valuable Lizzie’ers this time around!

Top Ten of 2013 (one point for each Lizzie, three points for the Lizard)

1. jswanson
2. Seymour Butts
3. Doc Raker
4. Eddie von White
5. Jedi Johnson
6. Joe Aiello
7. Chuck
8. Buddy
9. Noah Eisner
10. cap’n obvious

Chit Chat

Will you be attending any Cubs games this season? When and where?

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Elizabeth Pearson stumbled upon VFTB around 2006, and enjoys encouraging conversation among the wide variety of readers brought together by their love of the Cubs. She’s married, has a Cub-loving pug named Phinneaus, and enjoys biking, hiking, cooking and gardening. She calls Chesterton, Indiana home and hopes to one day retire on Mackinac Island. Connect with Lizzie via email or Instagram.