GirlieView Definitions

  • Lizzie = A funny, timely quote made on the VFTB site by our writers or commenters.
  • Lizard = The best Lizzie.
  • MVL = Most Valuable Lizzie’er: The person with the most Lizzies in the period under review (usually the past two weeks.)
  • Top 10 of 2013 = The folks with the most aggregate Lizzie points YTD (1 point for every Lizzie, 3 points for every Lizard.)

As you already know, this is all completely subjective and according to my whims.


  • not even a Chris Volstad-esque bad inning
  • Two runs wouldn’t seem to be an insurmountable deficit, but it is when you manage to put up only two hits.
  • the Cubs once again made Wandy Rodriguez look like the craftiest of veteran lefthanders
  • What’s the feeling on Wood this year?
  • I’d assume he’ll play hard.
  • Hopefully long as well
  • Three days into the season and the Cubs have been in first place the whole time. Time to celebrate while we have the chance.
  • It wasn’t too long ago that I cringed when James Russell would get put in. Now I think he’s our most trusted pitcher in the pen.
  • Theo: Hey Detriot…Marmol gets the save…looked fine…want him?
  • Leyland: Hey, does this say his ERA is 20.25??? Theo: No, don’t be silly Jim. ERA is Sabermetric for Environmentally Reliable Appliances. Carlos really went green this year and installed over 20 new light bulbs in PNC Park during our trip here. Other teams would love to have such a player, a guy who can pitch and assist the grounds-crew.
  • The Dodgers have released former Cubs closer, Kevin Gregg. That’s a Greggin’ sad piece of news as his career is probably over.
  • The fact that Marmol gets anything positive (the save) out of that train wreck yesterday is bogus.
  • Kevin Gregg……. Marmol………the choices.
  • Things I never though I would say #1: “Man, I miss Barney’s bat.”
  • the Upton family circus.
  • I expect we will be ‘shocked’ in the next day or so when Marmol and the Cubs discover an injury, thereby buying some time for the team to decide what to do.
  • How many insurance runs do the Cubs need before it’s safe to have Marmol enter the game?
  • 27….and that’s iffy
  • Luckily, I started drinking when I saw Marmol warming up. It helps.
  • Please somebody, just hold me and tell me everything will be alright.
  • We should see if MLB would allow us to put the ball on a tee for the final three outs of a game.
  • [Samardzija] needs to A) control his frustration on the mound when things do not go his way
  • We knew that the Cubs were going to struggle from the plate, but the early returns are a bit harsher than the perceived reality.
  • A comprehensive list of recommendations for the Cubs 2013 season would include a ton of beer.
  • And a short memory.
  • Enough of the former makes the latter possible.
  • Looks like Wendelstedt has a poor call rate in the Vicki Lawrence square.
  • He must have been too focused on the adjacent Gilbert Gottfried square…
  • Which of us isn’t guilty of focusing too much on the Gilbert Gottfried square? Cast that first stone!
  • maybe he was thinking about the lower Betty White square, in the center.
  • I’ll take Jose Canseco to block.
  • What? Nobody remembers Paul Lynde?
  • I was more of a George Goebel fan.
  • Is Castro drunk tonight?
  • The latest news is we will see [Garza] some time in mid-May.  My bet is on June.
  • With yesterday’s rain delay, it means the Cubs didn’t lose the series with the Brewers. That’s a nice little treat.
  • Who’s left. Camp? Camp for closer…let’s do that.
  • I would like to see [Clevenger] play there more often, see what he can do.
  • Kevin Gregg??? honestly??
  • Just when I thought it couldn’t get worse.
  • “Arctic Enima!”
  • New band?
  • I’ll go 5 bucks for every Ian Stewart home run, $10 for every Kevin Gregg save, $25 for every game Soriano starts at 3B and 5 cents for every comment by JSwanson, Raker, and Seymour that I deem to be made expressly and entirely to whore for Lizzies…
  • I have an idea – let’s just not use the bullpen anymore.
  • But if it does need to be updated and renovated–and believe me, it does–I’m pleased to have the project in the hands of another Cubs fan.


  • Chuck is starting to starting to look like a pessimistic genius.

Shout Outs

A big shout out to the following readers who submitted their first 2013 Lizzie. We’re so happy to have you here!

  • Chet
  • Rick Beato
  • Rocco Kavana
  • Troy Maskell


Congratulations to jswanson the Most Valuable Lizzie’er this time around!

Top Ten of 2013 (one point for each Lizzie, three points for the Lizard)

1. jswanson
2. Seymour Butts
3. Doc Raker
4. Eddie von White
5. Jedi Johnson
6. Joe Aiello
7. Buddy
7. Chuck
9. Gymjok
9. Noah Eisner

Chit Chat

Last time I asked you what is the best thing you’ve seen about this year’s Cubs so far. I’m going to ask the same thing again since we’re two weeks further in. Lemme hear those positive thoughts!

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Elizabeth Pearson stumbled upon VFTB around 2006, and enjoys encouraging conversation among the wide variety of readers brought together by their love of the Cubs. She’s married, has a Cub-loving pug named Phinneaus, and enjoys biking, hiking, cooking and gardening. She calls Chesterton, Indiana home and hopes to one day retire on Mackinac Island. Connect with Lizzie via email or Instagram.