Go: The Stage is Yours

The Cubs Convention is in full swing this weekend. Take the stage as someone in the know and tell the audience about the biggest change you would make to the team this season!

Do you have a question you’d like us to feature in the Go! column? Send it to lizzie@viewfromthebleachers.com and she’ll see what she can do!

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splishprin

I would bring in that shrink from the Natural. Maybe after hearing the “losing is a disease” speech a thousand times, they would find a way to win.
Cap’n obvious

Greg Maddux for pitching coach. Reggie Smith, John Mallee, Don Slaught, or anyone else really for hitting coach.
Tom_C

ummm, trying to ascertain what happened to my name above. It should read Tom_C and not splishprin (which are my kids nicknames)…hmmm
Doc Raker

Soriano to third, obvious isn’t it.
http://elizababble.com/ Lizzie

We don’t care what you call yourself, Tom, we like ya under any name!
http://elizababble.com/ Lizzie

Who is our hitting coach these days?
YUCottonPickin

Get rid of Brian Urlacher…oh wait wrong sport.

Move Castro to 2nd
Buddy

My first thought was, “stop giving at bats to automatic outs like Barney and Valbuena,” but in all honesty, what other options do they have? Vitters? Stewart? Lillibridge? Still too many crappy offensive players on this roster.
http://swantron.com/ jswanson

Bring back Reed Johnson to play hard.
Cap’n obvious

James Rowson is his name. He is not the answer, I can promise. The Cubs assistant hitting coach (get this) is Rob Deer. A guy who AVERAGED about a strikeout in every 3rd plate appearance, and had about a 3-1 k/BB ratio throughout his career, where he hit .220. The very definition of an all or nothing guy. 230 jacks, but over 1400k’s does not make them worth it.
Gymjok

VFTB Movies

Eyes of Laura Mars
Doc becomes smitten with a new patient named Laura who has recently moved from her native planet filled with women only,to a new planet populated by men only.

Mr. Magoo
Seymoor(nicknamed Butts for his creative excuses about his woeful hitting)discovers the real reason for his Mendoza line problem and goes to see his teammate for an exam.

The Curse of Lizzie Borden
Lizzie eats some bad ice cream and becomes obsessed with tracking down and butchering the cow that produced the bad milk.

Jeremiah Johnson
Jeremiah becomes delusional and wanders the wilderness thinking he’s Robert Redford.

The Courtship of Eddie’s Father
Eddie becomes jealous when his father is courted by the Wisconsin cola girl.

The Buddy Holly Story
Buddy’s neighbors become annoyed when at Christmas time Buddy discovers a unique talent for singing Klingon opera.

Napoleon and Josephine
Josephine falls for a short French guy who has a rash on his abdomen.

Star Wars:Episode VI Return of the Jedi
Jedi loses his receipt and has trouble returning his defective 11 inch light saber.

Noah’s Arc
Noah gets sued by an animal rights organization.

The Fast and the Furious
In this romantic comedy, Katie becomes furious when she finds out her fiance is running around with other women.

Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat
Joe,over root beers with his writers,wrestles with the idea of adding color to his amazing website.He ultimately rejects the idea realizing that many of his posters are already color commentators.

Child’s Play
Chuck believes predicting baseball is child’s play and tries to kill anyone who disagrees with his predictions.

VFTB Upcoming Attractions

DougS
In this new movie from the Science Channel we follow the life of Doug and his clone.

Cheers:The Movie
From the Syfy channel the old gang from Cheers is reunited.Norm becomes trapped in a repeating time loop where he walks into the bar and everyone calls out his name.He finally frees himself using statistical data.

Jswanson
From the animal planet station we follow the life of Jay,the male offspring of a swan family living on lake Michigan.

Cap’n Obvious
From the Discovery Channel we follow the explorations of a ship’s captain who gives orders to a crew who already know what he’s going to say before he says it.In the highly dramatic final scene the captain nearly runs over a family of swans.

In this new psychological thriller from Disney(untitled as the name keeps changing)we keep track of this Disney worker as he polls people in line at Disney with fasinating questions such as:Can you choose your own nickname or is it given to you? Is science useful?
http://swantron.com/ jswanson

I don’t know what the hell just happened there, but it’s great. Well done GJ…
Eddie Von White

Very funny. How long did it take to put this together?
Buddy

I’ve never trusted Klingon opera, and I never will.
YUCottonPickin

Since Disney now owns Star Wars, do me and Jedi get to co-star in the same film?
Chuck

Muhahahaha!
Doug S.

Nice work, funny stuff.
Dusty Baylor

Those who can’t do…teach? I guess?
Gymjok

Thank you sir.
What happened is every so often I get an idea and I like to share
hoping it will be enjoyable and/or useful.
Gymjok

Thanks.
Once I got the idea, thinking of the movies and comments
didn’t take long at all. I did take some time to look up the movie titles to get them correct.
The hard part was all the typing.
I got through about 12 of them when my session got timed out somehow. Since I don’t know much about computers,I was unable to get it back and had to retype the whole thing. I’m very grateful for spell check.
Gymjok

I don’t blame you. It sure can be annoying.
Or as Gynan said to Data,”You’re a droid and I’m a noid.”
Gymjok

Sure, as long as you’re not too goofy.
YUCottonPickin

Jedi will be a Jedi, I’ll be Buzz with Woody by my side trying to bring reason
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aR37xfXAXFY
Gymjok

Sounds menacing.
I’ll try to remember to not disagree with you.
Gymjok

I’m glad you both enjoyed it.
YUCottonPickin

Well we have a Harbowl, I’m going to pick the Ravens to win 28-24. I got the score right last year, hopefully I’ll get it again this year. Anyone know a good site to wager on the game?
Buddy

I’ll take the 49ers to win the “Bro Bowl.”
Eddie Von White

Watch it – you’re talking to a school teacher.
Buddy

Didn’t she also say, “It’s a long way to the top if you wanna rock and roll”?
Seymour Butts

Those who can’t teach, teach PE.
Seymour Butts

So much for the not being too goofy part.
YUCottonPickin

Well now that Disney owns Star Wars, there is a lot of plotlines you could make with me and Jedi together. Because in the 2nd Toy Story, the scene where Buzz tells Zurg he killed his father and Zurg saying no Buzz, I am your father was taken right out of Star Wars.
YUCottonPickin

I’m more angry than goofy
http://swantron.com/ jswanson

Watch it… you’re talking to an aspiring PE teacher.
Seymour Butts

Great! A Disney character on a jihad. No headline potential there.

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