I hope you all had a nice Thanksgiving, or whatever you like to celebrate around this time of year. I’m impressed with the wit this time around, best out-of-season collection of Lizzies we’ve had in awhile. And our top 10 is getting tight down the stretch! Enjoy.

GirlieView Definitions

  • Lizzie = A funny, timely quote made on the VFTB site by our writers or commenters.
  • Lizard = The best Lizzie.
  • MVL = Most Valuable Lizzie’er: The person with the most Lizzies in the period under review (usually the past two weeks)
  • Top 10 of 2012 = The folks with the most aggregate Lizzie points YTD (1 point for every Lizzie, 3 points for every Lizard)

As you already know, this is all completely subjective and according to my whims. Let’s go!

Lizzies

  • Yikes! Lizzies come out tomorrow…must think of something worthy…
  • A Baker Gets His Dough
  • If you didn’t see it, and that’s entirely possible due to the massive amount of other news that came down the MLB news portal,
  • This is a regime that has expressed to fans that the rebuild is going to come primarily through the farm and supplemented with smart free agents that make sense for the long term plan.
  • If you look closely, you can see the exact point where someone pisses in Strick’s Cheerios
  • Patience is in order.
  • Seasonal depression.  Get some sun.
  • I do laugh at the fact that $5.5/year has become “low risk”….if I had a son I would tie his right arm behind his back and make him do all his chores left handed.
  • Despite the fact that they would not have been my first choices, kudos to both Price and Dickey, who had great years on the mound.
  • Drinks on Raker!
  • My sincere congrats on pandering done well.
  • Chuck shut out of the Lizzies!  This make Chuck sad.
  • I’ve been in the limbo also known as LackofLizzieLand for a long time.
  • 1) Leftovers, 2) Being dismissive regarding Black Friday shopping stories
  • Unfortunately, I will be dragged to Black Friday sales with my wife so I can serve the role of “stand in line guy” “lifter of heavy objects guy”.  Only the vague promise of happy fun time keeps me going…
  • Been there…
  • Honestly, if I wasn’t married and had kids I would have no idea what to do with myself.
  • Deep dish pizza on Thanksgiving…you know that’s how the Pilgrims would’ve preferred it.
  • Great Black Friday deals were had in colonial Plymouth for three-corner hats, breeches, and shoes with giant buckles.
  • There was a run on candles.
  • What a great idea. The traditional Thanksgiving Lou Malnatis. I just received a 6 pack yesterday. Cheese and sausage. I believe Seymour refers to this product as “job security.”
  • While watching a football game, every time the announcer says that a player “plays the game hard”, we throw a turkey leg at the person to our left. If there is mention that a player “has come to play”, the gravy boat is emptied down the pants of the 3rd eldest person in the room. Mention of “a gamer” results in dinner rolls being thrown at the screen. That used to be the gravy boat, but Uncle Stinky got tired of replacing TV sets.
  • I have been watching the Bob Newhart Show, The Mary Tyler Moore Show, the Dick Van Dyke Show and the Rockford Files on the metv network. Great shows- just don’t make TV shows that way anymore Jimbo. I am having Mr Peterson and Elliot Carlin over for Thanksgiving, that is if Captain Howard Borden flys them in on time.
  • Are you inviting your brothers Darrell?
  • Big fan of the Rockford Files. Very under rated show.
  • There may be hope for you yet.
  • I love the Mary Tyler Moore show theme song.
  • The Golden Girls.  Hands down.
  • My wit-well has run dry.
  • What specifically makes Bud Selig so bad?
  • 2) allows the designated hitter
  • I’d say any business plan hinging on the selling of inedible sugar dough is in peril.
  • Not in America.
  • Camp tied for the league-lead in appearances last season with 80, in which he provided middling relief most of the time, with flashes of spectacular incompetence.
  • I hope you, Jedi, and Jermajusty have a nice time in OK.
  • The real reason for this move sitcom revenue.  LaHair will share an apartment with Bobby Scales and Matt Murton, in the hit new program “Strike Three.”  All three play for the Ham Fighters, obviously, and have the wackiest of neighbors.
  • The hilarity of big man Bryan LaHair fitting into the small booths at the local Johnny Rockets with his 4’8″ dates will be must see TV.
  • By date you mean prostitute, and by booth you mean shallow grave at the meadowlands.
  • Happy Thanksgiving VFTBuds… enjoy some turkey, be it baked, fried, or on a footlong wheat roll atop pepper jack triangles.
  • Thankful they don’t play home games in a war zone like Chavez Ravine.
  • Thankful they aren’t so insignificant as to be shuffled between leagues while no one notices.
  • Thankful we weren’t crippled by Bernie Madoff.
  • Thankful not to be affiliated with Philly in any way.
  • Thankful we didn’t nickname our stadium after a prison so the nightly attendance would feel more welcome.
  • Thankful we didn’t have this conversation in jorts while cursing our beloved superstar of last year.
  • Thankful you managed to work jorts in there.
  • I’m thankful for the folks who write for and comment on this blog.
  • Andre Johnson continued his miraculous return from the grave, which gave my fantasy (or as my brother Jermajesty calls it, “fairytale football”) team an unexpected boost.
  • Giancarlos Marmol for Giancarlos Stanton.  Get right on that.
  • I’d trade Samardzija for Stanton in a heartbeat
  • And just for clarity’s sake, that’s less of an actual comparison of an assistant hitting coach and a first-ballot Hall of Famer than it is an unnecessary-but-cathartic shot at the still-reigning King Weasel of Passive-Aggressive Mountain.
  • How come Katie and I are the only one’s on this site with actual photos of ourselves on our Gravitar?
  • I like Katie’s much better. No Butts about it.
  • Hey Seymour, how about we narrow that down to Katie only?

Lizard

  • Chasing skirts in bars can only entertain one so long. Raising children with a beloved spouse is as fullfilling as life gets, everything else is just filler to keep one busy.

MVL

  • Congragulations to jswanson, the Most Valuable Lizzie’er once again!

Shout Outs

Congratulations to these commenters for their first 2012 Lizzie! Thanks for joining us, we love having you here!

  • FourFeathers
  • Tony Soprano ;-)

2012 Top Ten YTD

1. Jeremiah Johnson
1. jswanson
3. Doc Raker
4. Seymour Butts
5. Jedi Johnson
6. cap’n Obvious
7. Buddy
8. Joe Aiello
9. Chuck
10. Eddie Von White

Chit Chat

Baseball’s Winter Meetings begin on Monday in Nashville. Come on, lemme year the wild roar of excitement! Last year’s meetings were quite prolific with the Angels’ signing of Albert Pujols and Florida’s wild spending spree. We know neither of those things will be happening again this year. Let’s hear from you. What do you expect to come of this year’s meetings as far as the Cubs are concerned? (“Nothing” is the anticipated response here. Props-in-advance to anyone who can come up with something other than that!)

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Elizabeth Pearson stumbled upon VFTB around 2006, and enjoys encouraging conversation among the wide variety of readers brought together by their love of the Cubs. She’s married, has a Cub-loving pug named Phinneaus, and enjoys biking, hiking, cooking and gardening. She calls Chesterton, Indiana home and hopes to one day retire on Mackinac Island. Connect with Lizzie via email or Instagram.