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January 2012

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Morning News: Is a Top 100 list news? (and other bits of baseball minutiae)

Written by , Posted in General

Yep, Someone Was Watching: Unless you’ve been living under a rock, in a cave, or anywhere outside the MLB Network studios, you probably already know that baseball’s flagship cable network aired a one hour special at 10 p.m. (ET) on Wednesday night to unveil MLB.com’s Top 100 prospects list for 2012. For those of you that missed this highly anticipated event, here’s a quick rundown of the future Cubs appeared on the list:

#67 – Javier Baez – SS

#37 – Anthony Rizzo – 1B

#33 – Brett Jackson – OF

To borrow a phrase from Tony Kornheiser: that’s it…that’s the list.

Miggy Making a Move: In a move that is surprising to no one, Detroit Tigers slugger Miguel Cabrera confirmed Tuesday that he’ll be moving approximately 127.27 feet across the diamond in 2012 and reclaim his former spot at 3B. Of course, the position change was made necessary due to the addition of Prince Fielder, who as you know, signed a Fielderian sized contract on Monday to hold down first base in Motown for the next nine* seasons. 

*Please note, it is yet to be confirmed as to whether the length of this contract is based on human years  or “Mo Vaughn” years.

Breaking News! Gio Gonzalez Joined the Nats: If you read that and thought “Wait a minute, didn’t that happen a month ago?” you’re not going crazy…it did happen a month ago, when he was traded from Oakland to Washington. However, the Nats decided today would be a good day to hold a press conference welcoming their “big off-season addition”. Here’s a little timeline illustrating the decision process behind today’s presser:

Dec. 23 – Gonzalez is traded to the Nats after Washington is unsuccessful in luring Mark Buehrle to our nation’s Capitol.

Jan. 15 – Gonzalez signs the largest contract for a pitcher eligible for arbitration for the first time

Jan. 24 – The Nationals do not sign Prince Fielder

Jan. 25 – The Nationals, after being rumored to be involved in every big free agent dalliance this off-season, realize  “Oh $#%^, our fans were expecting something big this year to make up for last year’s Jayson Werth money pit…time to turn up the hype machine on this Gio kid!”

Something Makes Me Think We’ve Seen the End of Daryle Ward: The 36 year old former Cub (’07-’08) hasn’t played in the bigs since his days in Chicago, but he’s still been kicking around in the minor leagues for the last few seasons in hopes of making a comeback. This isn’t going to help – Ward will be sitting for the first 50 games of 2012 after violating MiLB’s ban on amphetamine use.

Oh, and one more thing: Doc Raker…the Italian Dusty Baker?

  • Lizzie

    Hm. Was the garbage can atop the desk for any special reason? Too much celebrating the night before, maybe? 😉 Looking good, guys!! Thanks for sharing! Did any Girlies attend this year?

  • chuck

    Either this year or next the Nats wil be a very, very good team. They are stacked with star caliber young players. Philly had better look out.

  • BLPCB

    I’m with Chuck. Bryce Harper looks like the real deal to me

  • I was hoping to see a fancy silver serving tray with a nice cut of beef tenderloin on the desk…maybe a fancy goblet of petit syrah. Fly the W flag today fellas…

  • Lizzie

    @jswanson I don’t think that tenderloin’s gonna fly with the good Dr. Seymour in the clubhouse. Maybe an unadorned salmon filet with a dry side salad?

  • Doc Raker

    Lizzie- I had to send him down, toughest part of my job. The janitor just left my office after cleaning and left the garbage can on the desk. As manager I had my own office with it’s own bathroom. When you are managing guys like the Cap’n and Butts one needs some solitude, trust me on that.

  • Bryan

    I’m with BLPCB in that I’m also with Chuck. I do think we will see Harper take some “inside” pitches if his behavior follows him to the big leagues.

  • Doc Raker

    Butts doesn’t eat healthy, he eats cheap. Butts skipped the Saddle Ranch Chop House and went to Quiznos- they toast their sandwiches there you know. I went with the Bushmills on the rocks this weekend, no Petit Syrah for me- not such a great wine list at the Saddle Ranch Chop House. A rule of thumb for me is ” whenever a mechanical bull is in a restaurant don’t even bother to look at the wine list.”
    The Cap’n won the mechanical bull riding contest vs our endodontist friend. The Cap’n actually paid off the bull operator $20 to go easy on him so he would win bragging rights on riding a mechanical bull.

  • Doc Raker

    Lizzie- I didn’t see any girls playing this years. Some wives came to watch, none of ours but some others- not a great spectator sport. Baseball is slow enough- played by a bunch of 50+ crippled men it gets really slow.

  • BLPCB

    I hate Quiznos. The people working there don’t know how to make my sandwich right. How hard is it to make an Italian sandwich on whole wheat bread with lettuce, tomato, green pepper, banana pepper, a little bit of ranch dressing, and avocado?

  • Bushmills has too many syllables for a cowboy bar. “Jack” or “Crown” or even “Beam” would have been more appropriate. As for Quiznos? They’ve got a pepper bar.

  • Jeremiah Johnson

    Thanks, J. Ten minutes of watching the Spongmonkeys Quiznos ads has greatly improved my day.

  • BLPCB

    My favorite Quizno’s commercial is when this guy wrestles his dog for the sandwich, it comes apart on the floor, he picks it up, puts it back into the sandwich and eats it

  • Kris

    Lizzie–maybe we’ll have to round up some VFTB Girlies one year and invade. 🙂

    I haven’t seen a Quizno’s in the Chicago area in a couple of years. I miss them but not the creepy rat-squirrel-googley-eyed-monster commercials they had a few years back.

  • BLPCB

    There was one near my dorm at UIC, on Halsted and a couple blocks past Roosevelt, I think Maxwell

  • cap’n obvious

    For the record, that is not Cap’n Obvious in the photo. Cap’n Obvious is about a foot taller and 50 lbs. fatter than the singleA player in Raker’s office. Cap’n Obvious took the photo. Further:
    A: ONLY an Italian Dusty Baker would run his ace out to finish a Sunday morning game on the bump after he threw 212 pitches on Friday afternoon.
    B: I absolutely DID pay off the riduculously beautiful mechanical bull operator. Alec Berg offered up $40 worth of drinks to the winner of the head-to-head bull riding contest. A little payola, and I came away with a 100% profit. Took a beating in Kangaroo court for it, but let’s face it, it’s the American way to buy wins and/or cheat a little. Also, twas the first time most of us had ever gotten a gander at Berg’s wallet. I copped to it immediately after the drinks were consumed. The endodontist was overly congratulatory and gave me a case of the guilts something fierce.
    C: Saddle Ranch’s wine list was pathetic…but I needed my anti-oxidants, so I had a couple of glasses of zin. Had I known they were to be delivered in a plastic wine glass, I’d have opted for something else. Like Quiznos.
    D: 82 and sinny in Redondo Beach as I type this. How’s the weather in Port Huron, Doc?

  • cap’n obvious

    it’s either sinny or sunny…I got confused…

  • I like the way you roll, Cap.

  • Doc Raker

    30 wet and grey in Port Huron, what a goat screw. At least if it was colder the kids could play pond hockey but the ponds are not frozen. One game a day, trapped in a Fairfield Inn this is tough. The only bright side of being in Port Huron is I don’t have to dine with Butts.

  • Whenever I am in Port Huron, I make sure to swing by my two favorite things in St. Clair County…the Blue Water Bridge and Fort Gratiot Lighthouse. Whenever I make stuff up about obscure towns, I swing by Wikipedia.

  • Doc Raker

    And there you have it jswanson, looking at a bridge is a highlight in tourism marketing here in Port Huron.

  • The city council must be anti-phallus…you would think the lighthouse would get top billing.

  • Buddy

    Hoping for big things from Rizzo, Jackson, and Baez. All three are intriguing prospects, and not the traditional over-valued Cubs prospects.

  • cap’n obvious

    Thanks JSwanson. At least someone gets it. The endodontist used to run with Doc Raker back in their single days. He had an obvious unfair advantage of scads of experience with large fuzzy things attempting to mechanically buck him off. I, on the other hand, had precious little experience in such activities, other than one or two post-Hawkeyes co-eds in the dorms of UIC some 20 years prior. I didn’t want to cheat. I felt I HAD to.

  • Doc Raker

    Out of respect for Mrs Obvious I will bite my tongue about the Cap’n premarital dating habits.

  • Out of respect for the large, fuzzy UIC alumni, I’ll follow suit.

  • BLPCB

    We have multiple UIC alums who post here?

  • Doc Raker

    Are you large and fuzzy too BLPCB?

  • BLPCB

    No. That’s why I want to know who the other UIC alum on here is

  • Doc Raker

    Obvious is a UI alum.

  • BLPCB

    UI as in UIUC (Urbana-Champaign), UIC (Chicago), or UIS (Springfield)

  • Doc Raker

    UIC

  • BLPCB

    Oh yes, now I remember this conversation a while back about another UIC alum.

  • CubbieDude

    cap’n obvious: “I’d rather be known as a cheater, than as a loser.” Forrest Griffin

  • Joe Aiello

    Testing 1,2,3