Good morning, all! The air is cool and crisp, the leaves are changing colors, and I’m back with another look at your best work for the week. Let’s do this…

The Wizzies

  • Today, however, Chicago didn’t record an error. Let’s hear it for lowered expectations!
  • Maybe we should go undercover on a few Sox sites. “Cmon you wankahs, Pujols would be wicked hitting after Youk.”
  • I predict Fielder will end up in the AL, either Texas or Anaheim, probably Anaheim so he can be close to all the other tofu freaks. If he goes to Texas I predict he will fall off the veggie wagon and get impaled by a live steer at the Ponderosa on a steak bender.
  • You know how East-coasters all lump the Midwest into the same category? I guess I made the same assumption in regards to Long Beach and Anaheim. They have Disney, you have Snoop Dogg. Pretty much the same thing in my book…sorry Doc.
  • Wait…I thought I was going to be the new manager? Damn…I’ll have to cancel that nameplate and desk I ordered….
  • Carlos looks like he’s lost on an unfamiliar planet. His contract makes a trade unlikely, so he needs a self esteem coach. Kind of like those guys who tell most boxers ..”you da man”… get his head straight and he’s an asset. As he sits he’s a loaded diaper.
  • Thank you for having me relive that game in such excruciating detail. Thank you very much. How would you like to come over and make my kids cry? Slash my car tires? Take a big dump on my front porch? Throw some eggs at my second story windows? Write “Bartman” in my backyard with gasoline?
  • If Alou would have told everyone he pees on his hands, the whole incident could have been avoided.
  • Here’s hoping the Cubs overthrow the Quade regime like a corrupt dictator: quickly, and with little concern for human life.

Top Wizzie Contributors

Doc Raker-30
Doug S.-20
Seymour Butts-20
Eddie Von White-8
Larry Sproul-8
Rich Beckman-7
Jeremiah Johnson-6

Question of the Week

If you could choose one player, dead or alive, that would be on the Opening Day 2012 Cubs roster, who would it be and why?


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