Okay, it’s time to have some fun in the midst of yet another season of baseball butchery. Let ’em fly, just keep it relatively clean and nothing that’s culturally offensive.
I’ll do the first two:
Being a Cubs fan is like being a member of the Lost Tribes of Israel. You spend an eternity wandering throughout the Diaspora in search of the Promised Land.
Being a Cubs fan is like being a seventeen-year cicada. You spend sixteen years underground – when it’s your day in the sunshine you get screwed and then you die.
Let’s see what y’all can come up with!