That’s right, ME! Dusty the Clown! As you know boys and girls, we must be totally fair in how we run the Cubs. Beginning tomorrow Ringmaster Hendry will be on hand for the first day of the Cubs’ Lineup Bucket Toss game. Aww, what’s wrong Todd, can’t play bucket toss? Who’s gonna bat second Cubs fans? That’s right, NEIFI! Come on Neifi, hit that last bucket!

And don’t you worry boys and girls, Ringmaster Hendry doesn’t listen to all those mean reporters. He doesn’t listen to anybody, this is his circus and he’s going to do as he pleases. And Cookie MacFail only listens to Ringmaster Hendry. Join us tomorrow in the Grand March to 100 Losses, Cubs fans. And who’s your favorite clown? That’s right, DUSTY!!!

Dusty-o-Meter: 88 games left
Hendry-o-Meter: 412 games left

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