View From The Bleachers

Talking Cubs Baseball Since 2003



May 2005



Classless Act

Written by , Posted in General

Sometimes I wonder how people have no common sense whatsoever. I just so happened upon the post you see below. After reading it, I was so disgusted that someone would be that classless to even THINK the post would be remotely appropriate. After leaving my comment in disgust, I was going to just never return to the site. However, the more I thought about it, the more angry I became. Cancer is a very serious issue and one that is not a joking matter. To infer in a post that it’s unfortunate that cancer did not take Dusty Baker’s life is irresponsible, and heartless, regardless of if it was meant as a joke. I would like to publicly ask that the writer of the post would not only apologize publicly on the site, but make a donation to the American Cancer Society in Dusty Baker’s name. I would urge everyone that reads this post to leave their comment in show of support of my donation and apology request. The post that angered me is listed below.

CHICAGO–In a rare physically visible appearance, Prostate Cancer apologized yesterday for claiming the lives of so many loving, caring, knowledgeable, and valuable human beings, while leaving Dusty Baker alive. Noted contributors to the human race claimed by Cancer are Don Ameche, Bill Bixby, Sir Alec Guiness, Johnny Ramone, Telly Savalas, and Frank Zappa. All of Cancer’s famous victims had made the world a better place to live, which is exactly why Cancer did not claim Baker’s life.

“You know, you knock off someone like Obi-Wan Kenobi, David Banner, or Kojak, and people stand up and take notice. You knock off Dusty Baker, and who gives a crap?” Cancer said. “I’m just not going to waste my time with that guy. Plus, his prostate was weird-looking.” Cancer manifested itself in the lovable form of a Zodiac crab consisting entirely of undifferentiated cells, much to the delight of the children in the area.

While Cancer would not reveal plans for future victims, it did express its sorrow for claiming so many good people, while refusing to take Baker. “Why do bad things happen to good people, and not to total idiots? Don’t ask me. I’m a genetic mutation, not a philosopher,” Cancer said.