View From The Bleachers

Talking Cubs Baseball Since 2003



October 2017



GirlieView (10/12/2017)

Written by , Posted in General

GirlieView Definitions

  • Lizzie = A funny, timely, and/or interesting quote made on the VFTB site by our writers or commenters.
  • Lizard = The best Lizzie.
  • MVL = Most Valuable Lizzie’ers: Those with the most Lizzies in the period under review (usually the past two weeks.)
  • Top 10 of the 2017 Season = The folks with the most aggregate Lizzie points YTD (1 point for every Lizzie, 3 points for every Lizard.)

As you already know, this is all completely subjective and according to my whims.


  • a five year old showed me how to stop my phone number from showing up on reply posts . . . if I can just remember what he said again . . .
  • I don’t see his phone number. MLB has blacked it out.
  • Forget Brad’s number, give out Donna’s number.
  • Doc is a smart man.
  • Do you think Maadon drank enough to forget to pull Hendricks out in the 6th tonight?
  • For all the bitching we have done about Genius Joe’s iPad and the Cubs Lackeysidaysical play the first half you do have to say this: The Cubs are playing their best ball right now and have a lot of energy. No one looks tired. They look ready. Are they better than the Nats and/or whoever else they may or may not play I don’t know. But they look ready so for that Genius Joe’s iPad paid off. The Cubs are having fun again.
  • I’ve always liked this Maddon fellow
  • The Iowa Cubs, err, the Chicago Catchers, no.. The 2017 Central Division Champions (there it is!)
  • Professor Kyle Hendricks’ final lecture of the season was masterful
  • Happ is not a good centerfielder, but he is dangerous at the plate. It will be interesting to see how Maddon gets him ABs in the post-season.
  • Cardinals home in October.
  • Business done, division in hand, party complete
  • Today is Len Elimination Day.
  • John Lackey appears headed to the bullpen, which will give many of us reason to be relieved.
  • Jimi gets game 1, the Cubs are on the right track.
  • His name is Kyle. If I had wanted people to call him Jimi, I’d have named him Jimi.
  • I’m OK with Doc calling him Jimi, otherwise I get confused and think he’s talking about me and how I pitched in game 7.
  • I heard a Theo interview on the Score where he said Murphy is 0 for 6 against Wilson, and that Murphy is a big consideration because of 2015.
  • Murphy doesn’t have a hit off me in his career either, why am I not on the roster?
  • Taking Baez out would be a mistake. We are not going to win this series by out-slugging Washington.
  • You might want to tell Javy that–he’s swinging at everything like it’s gonna be a 5-run home run.
  • You’re literally the worst Cubs fan I’ve ever seen.
  • We could create a whole new professional baseball league with all of the brilliant baseball minds out there.
  • The Offense – There was little. The End.
  • I looked on the radar, but I didn’t see the massive cloud of irony that is surely floating over Wrigley this morning: Dusty pulls his starter early and the reliever immediately gives up the tying run?
  • the Twitter


  • If there is anything upon which I can reflect today, it is that, despite the mind-numbing stress and torture playoff baseball gives me, I am living in a golden era of Chicago Cubs baseball.

Shout Outs

  • Big shout outs to Colin Kruse and Kyle Hendricks’ Mom for their first 2017 Season Lizzies!!!! Thanks for being here!


  • Congratulations to Michael Stevens, Doc Raker, and Brad Lyerla, our Most Valuable Lizzie-ers this time around! Thank you all for everything you contribute here!

Top 10 of the 2017 Season

(one point for each Lizzie, three points for the Lizard)

1. Sherm
2. Doc Raker
3. cap’n realist
4. Eddie von White
5. Doug S.
5. Michael Stevens
7. jswanson
8. Adam Peters
9. Jerry in Wisconsin
9. Seymour

Chit Chat

  • Housekeeping Item: cap’n realist won the “game 1 starting lineup” contest I ran in the last GirlieView. I gave three points for the correct player at the correct position in the correct order, two points for the player and position (wrong spot in the batting order) and one point for a correct starting player. Thanks cap’n, CAPS, Doug S., Doc Raker, jswanson, and Jerry in Wisconsin for playing along!
  • Chit Chat: When this column posts we will all be doing our usual speculating (read: hand wringing, teeth gnashing, garment tearing, Xanax popping) since it will be a mere four or five hours until game time. What are you doing while we wait? Are you excited? Nervous? Confident? Pessimistic? Tell us!
  • Jerry in Wisconsin

    I am nervously confident about tonight. I hope the Cubs do not do their no hits in the first six innings, or a couple of worthless hits in the first six and then lose routine. I want them to start out fast score a bunch against the starter early, and then see if they can chip away at Scherzer and any other reliever Dusty throws at them. I know Kyle will throw a good game.

    • “start out fast score a bunch against the starter early.” What’s that? I’m not familiar.

  • Michael S.

    Work now, trying to forget the image of what’s-his-name’s homer coasting into the basket, and trying to decide what my beverage of choice will be tonight. After, try to grab a nap before game time, maybe some dinner.

    • Jealous. I wanted a nap but will opt for an aerobics class with a caffeine chaser. (Did you see poor Happ twisting himself around out there? He wasn’t catching it. Not sure but I think that may have made us feel even worse about it than we already do.)

      • Sherm

        Yeah – he may have been the only Cub happy to see it go into the basket. It was going to be 3 or 4 runs, either way, and he looked like less of a doofus this way. I’ve heard the expression “twisting in the wind” before, but had never SEEN it.

        I was invited to the Eagles/Panthers game tonight, but no way in hell would I choose football over baseball, plus it’s Eagles/Panthers.

        I’ll work until 6 or 7, go get a light bite and come back in time for the first pitch.

        Tonight’s hero = Willson Contreras

      • cap’n realist

        tonight’s hero: Kyle Hendricks.

      • Sherm

        From your lips to God’s ears.

        I meant offense. But, Hendricks might be that, too, the way this offense is going.

        I did see that Maddon is going with his best defensive lineup tonight (or close to it, anyway) so that’s a good thing.

  • Eddie Von White

    I’m at the dealership getting my car serviced while watching Let’s Make A Deal in the waiting room. Just drank two cups of weak waiting room coffee which means I’ll be awake at 2 a. m. CST. I hope it is a happy sleepless night.

    • cap’n realist

      Eddie Von Cornholio

      • Seymour Butts

        heh heh.

  • Bryzzo1744

    Just finished work. I’m feeling sick. But I’m not going to miss the game tonight. So I’m going to read some news, get some Chinese food (hot tea, hot and sour soup, and wasabi mustard works for me when I’m sick), go home and have more tea.

  • Seymour Butts

    At my day job here on the best coast up until game time. Then hoping the phone stays quiet.
    As our boys have more talent that the slime town nine, I expect a victory tonight on the pitch. Of course I expected the same last night. They will earn what they achieve (Laz is not behind the plate tonight).

  • On my way out the door to grab rugrat 2 from preschool and rugrat 1 from kindergarten.. kids’ dinner / wrap up work / eat leftover kid’s dinner / baths etc. Pacing around the living room after that..

    • Sherm

      You forgot to mention a plethora of profanity laced texts between Raker, Realist and yours truly.

  • cap’n realist

    I’m currently in the midst of smoking 75 lbs of tri tip for the 60 gallons of chili I’m making tomorrow for the LA Sherriff’s Department’s Chili Cookoff. Last year, my team was first place People’s Choice, and 2nd place Judges Choice. More importantly, the event raised $40,000 in 5 hours for Special Olympics. A lot of work, but my mind is off the game. Sorta.

    • Sherm

      I knew you were smoking SOMETHING…

      Didn’t know it was meat

    • Seymour Butts

      Dude, you really don’t want to smoke that much…does not matter what. You can’t help but inhale.

    • Bryzzo1744

      What do you put in your chili? I’m making chili this weekend and I’m intrigued by this smoked tri tip chili.

    • Whoa.. never thought of that.. sounds great

    • Michael S.

      I learned that chili is measured in gallons at large scale today.

  • Eddie Von White

    Still awake.

    • Ben

      It’s only 1030 eddie get back to me when it’s midnight lol

      • Eddie Von White

        It’s midnight.

      • Ben

        Yes it is lol and I’m ready for bed

  • Michael S.

    Haven’t been this nervous in a long time…

    • Eddie Von White

      Heart attack. Where’s Seymour?

      • Seymour Butts

        I was in my garage (tv on of course).
        Un fucking believable.

  • Kyle

    Wade Davis is my ginger hero.

    • Seymour Butts

      Is it too late to vote on which team wins?

      • Eddie Von White

        It’s never to late.

  • Adam Peters

    Clonazepam is the new Xanax.

    • We ought to all get a prescription filled before 7 Central tomorrow.