View From The Bleachers

Talking Cubs Baseball Since 2003



March 2017



GirlieView (03/02/2017)

Written by , Posted in General

GirlieView Definitions

  • Lizzie = A funny, timely, and/or interesting quote made on the VFTB site by our writers or commenters.
  • Lizard = The best Lizzie.
  • MVL = Most Valuable Lizzie’ers: Those with the most Lizzies in the period under review (usually the past two weeks.)
  • Top 10 of the 2016/2017 Off-Season = The folks with the most aggregate Lizzie points YTD (1 point for every Lizzie, 3 points for every Lizard.)

As you already know, this is all completely subjective and according to my whims.


  • You had a Lizzie? Huh.
  • this was the most awesomest Lizzie’s yet.
  • since we’re getting personal, I like your basic chick flick.
  • Eddie Von Sap
  • “I’ll take Anal Bum Cover for $100, Alex.” Which I’m guessing is Seymour’s favorite category.
  • Then Sherm asks right out of the chute: “can I have distorted scrotums for $1000 Alex?”
  • This was a particularly awesome Lizzie installment.
  • Chicks dig the long ball’-Greg Maddux
  • Chicks deeg thee tweesteed ball – Felix Pie
  • Eddie von Schrute was my favorite Office character.
  • Lots of Lizzie’s for an off season fortnight.
  • McCutcheon has to deal with a new position and the slight of losing his more prestigious spot in center.
  • The baseball team from St. Lois (yes, CAPS, I know how to spell Louis…but it’s funnier without “u”) (Get it? That’s two jokes in one, so four. Damn. I’m on fire.)
  • Whatever happens, unless they fall flat on their faces (which seems almost impossible), this year is going to be great viewing.
  • The Cubs will win, period!
  • Eddie von Confidence
  • Welcome. Nice to see a new writer on the team! Now if you could earn a few Lizzie’s…
  • Schwarber shouldn’t ever catch, period, to protect him physically.
  • Contreras is the catcher. Montero is the backup. If both get hurt in the same 48 hours, we’ll have to stomach Schwarber for a day, until Caratini or Rice arrive from AAA.
  • What happened to Rondon is a mix of major league scouts being good at their jobs and Rondon not making adjustments. I believe it’s that simple.
  • Please, please, please quit trying to ‘fix’ baseball.
  • the ability to watch anything, from anywhere, is here, except when it comes to baseball.
  • Look for these common sense changes to take place soon as we know Commish Manfred regularly reads this blog as does all the baseball brass as does Tom Ricketts and Theo and Jed. Go Cubs!
  • Penalize the batter 1 strike if they adjust their batting gloves after every. single. pitch. (the Nomar rule)
  • By necessity they will need nets to protect from flying objects leaving the field that “normal” people would simply duck. I know a lady we could put in charge of the netting.
  • Sherm for commissioner.
  • That’s commisSHERMer to you.
  • When can we have an “Ask Sherm Anything” post?
  • It’s life. No more coddling.
  • Eddie Von Realist
  • I am sad that Santo passed away before being able to witness a Cubs World Series title and even more sad that he was inducted into the Hall of Fame posthumously. Of any person that has received the honor of the Hall, I believe Santo would have been the most appreciative.
  • Hearing the Go Cubs Go song at the end of the game today was great.
  • Klassic Kasper: “If you have the last name Berg and you’re a pitcher, doesn’t your nickname have to be “ice”?”
  • Heyward’s swing looks significantly better. Still not a $20 million swing, but better than any optometrist or cardiologist’s swing I’ve seen.
  • Where the hell is everyone.. baseball starts and we’ve got crickets chirping.
  • Dejesus christ those were some dark times.


  • Spring training has finally begun!

Shout Outs

  • No one had their very first 2016/2017 Off-Season Lizzie this time so let’s have a shout out for everyone! Thanks for being here!


  • Congratulations to cap’n realist, Eddie von White, and Sherm, our Most Valuable Lizzie-ers this time around! Thank you all for everything you contribute here!

Top 10 of the 2016/2017 Off-Season

(one point for each Lizzie, three points for the Lizard)

1. Sherm
2. Doc Raker
3. Eddie von White
4. jswanson
5. cap’n realist
6. Adam Peters
7. Doug S
8. Seymour
9. Brad Lyerla
9. Kyle

Chit Chat

  • One month from T-O-D-A-Y the Cubs will open the regular season in St. Louis. It’s a nationally televised night game, so most will be able to watch it. If you’re lucky, you’ve even seen a game or two already, listened on the radio, or at the very least have read some Cubs news coverage. Who is impressing you so far? Who are you wanting to see more of? Less of? None of?


  1. Adam Peters
  2. Doug S.
  3. Buddy
    • Adam Peters
      • Mark_from_Toronto
      • Doug S.
      • Jerry in Wisconsin
      • Sherm
    • Sherm
    • Doc Raker
  4. JTBarrett16
  5. Seymour Butts
  6. Junior Von White
    • Eddie Von White
    • cap'n realist
      • Sherm
      • Jerry in Wisconsin
      • cap'n realist
      • Jerry in Wisconsin
      • Sherm
      • JTBarrett16
      • cap'n realist
      • JTBarrett16
      • JTBarrett16
      • Sherm
      • JTBarrett16
      • Sherm
      • JTBarrett16
  7. Doc Raker
  8. Doug S.
    • JTBarrett16
    • Doc Raker
      • JTBarrett16